Rebuilding Rob

Tonight, while I was scrolling through social media, I learned that the nurse got married a few months back.

The funny thing is that we’ve been talking. Texting actually. Not a lot but staying in touch on the holidays and whatnot.

She is the second person I’ve dated since X2 who has gotten married.

This one is hitting me much harder than I anticipated.

I didn’t want to admit that it was over. I always thought that we would get together again. And then she was gone. You think you have all the time in the world, until… Yeah

Admiral William Riker, Star Trek: The Next Generation

I think it’s human nature for us to take things for granted. I don’t even like that expression. “taking things for granted“. There’s such a negative connotation to it. But the fact is, I don’t think that the human mind is really capable of fully appreciating how finite our lives are. my neighbors learned that lesson in the worst possible way roughly 10 days ago.

Jessica used to use the phrase “all the time in the world“ when we were dating. There really is no such thing.

I guess I just felt like The Nurse and I would cross paths again. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not arrogant enough to think that she was “waiting for me”. The news of her marriage was just… Surprising.

Perhaps our paths will cross again someday. As fragile and unpredictable as life is, our world is also a place of infinite possibilities. Look at my experience with Boss Lady. I had a crush on her in high school, and she probably didn’t even know existed. It would be nearly 3 decades later before we would we finally met.

The future has been on my mind a lot lately. It seems like I am reconciling many things from my past for the first time in a long time, my future feels wide open, and I’m content. I’m not afraid of the future; nor am I longing for the past.