Rebuilding Rob

Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country, was released late in 1991. It was to be the final Star Trek film featuring the cast of the original Star Trek series. It’s released also coincided with the 25th anniversary of the original show.

As Star Trek has always been so famous for doing, The plot of TDS tied into real world events. The story deals with the destruction of one of the moons of the Klingon home world, Chronos. Because of their tremendous military and defense budgeting, the Klingons do not have the resources to deal with this environmental catastrophe. They have no choice, but to reach out to a longtime rivals, the Federation (the good guys that include earth) for help. This would be the first steps that would lead to lasting peace between empire and United Federation of planets.

People on both sides are concerned about these new developments. Some Klingons fear that it will lead the annihilation of their culture. Some members of the federation are critical because they feel this would be a time to “bring Klingons to their knees”

It’s important to know that this movie was released in late 1991. At this time in the real world, the Soviet Union was coming to an end, with all 15 Republics becoming independent countries. In fact, the very “communist block“ of Eastern Europe was seeing tremendous upheaval. Star Trek was doing what Star Trek does: it was mirroring real world events in their fictionalized Science Fiction storyline.

Throughout the movie, we see most of this internal conflict through the eyes of Captain Kirk himself. Captain Kirk does not like Klingons. He says as much himself. After all, Kirk son was murdered by a Klingon captain in Star Trek III: the search for Spock. Kirk is forced to come to terms with some very big questions: am I afraid of change? Am I too old to change?

I realize I’m probably giving away a lot of the plot of this movie so I will stop here. But I will just say this: while Star Trek fans would argue that Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan is the best Star Trek movie, I think I can make a compelling argument that TUC is a close second.

I bring all of this up, because i’m currently feeling a lot like Captain Kirk did in Star Trek six. I dealing with changes in the interpersonal dynamics that I’ve been dealing with for the last dozen or so years.

2 days back, I wrote about kid 2 and I traveling to Illinois to meet up with kid 1 and X1 for a college tour. I thought things went really well. It was not really awkward at all spending that much time with one. She even watched kid 2 for a little bit while one, and I went on the campus tour. Then, I invited kid and X12 crash at our hotel room for the night. They have actually been camping on most of this road trip so I figured it would be nice for them to get off of the road and get a decent night sleep in a decent shower.

Kid 1 was genuinely happy to see us, as I knew he would be. I know that he’s grateful for anytime that he and I get to spend together. But I think it was more shocked that X1 was as appreicoative as she did. It was nice. There was no drama. No old baggage of the past. Yeah, we’re ex spouses, but we were therefor Kid 1. That was really all that mattered. More than that, nobody even made a conscious attempt to acknowledge any of this. It was just there, and we all knew it.

In Star Trek VI, Captain Kirk explains that he “got used to hating Klingons”. Perhaps even more importantly than that, Kirk realizes that he was afraid of the future because it would mean the end of things as he knew it. No more neutral zone, he said. No more hating Klingons. He felt that he was not equipped to live in the new area. This sentiment is mirrored by Gorkon, the chancellor of the Klingon Empire. And one point in the movie, Gotkon tells Kirk “if there is to be a Brave New World, our generation is going to have the hardest time living in it“.

I don’t know how I feel about this peace between X 1 and I. don’t get me wrong, I’m very grateful for it. All I ever wanted was peace in our post divorce lives. But it feels strange. Like Kirk, I got used to hating X1. Hell, the whole reason I started this blog is because I was trying to work through my feelings and experiences as a divorce. This blog owes its existence to my divorce.

Just before her and Kid 1 left our hotel to head to Wisconsin, we said her goodbyes. The boys and I got our requisite photos together. X1 and I actually hugged each other. We have not done that since the day that I left South Carolina. And felt awkward, but I felt like it was the right. This is the first time I’m consciously admitting this, but I was ready to hug her at the end of this trip too.

Don’t misunderstand any of this. I’m not developing feelings for my ex-wife again. That ship sailed, a long time ago. But I feel it really doesn’t work a turning point in our relationship.

I remember when Mark McGwire broke MLB’s single-season homer record in 1998 with his 62nd Homerun, he was given a microphone to address the crowd at Busch Stadium that night. He said his requisite than yous to his son, and his parents. I vividly remember him, thanking his ex-wife and saying “you’re a great ex-wife“. I thought it was funny, but even then I knew what he meant. He was trying to say that he and his ex-wife had a good relationship; at least as far as they were both involved with their life and doing their best to coparent.

The truth is X1 and I are going to have a lot more interactions in the coming year. Kid one is starting his senior year of year high school in the next few weeks. There will be graduation stuff to deal with, college plans, things of that sort. Iknow that at bare minimum, I will be making a trip down to South Carolina to for his graduation next May/June.

I may need until then to process all of this.

Thanks for stopping by Rebuilding Rob. Be sure to like, comment and r subscribe to my blog below. It’s greatly appreciated! Also, feel free to follow me on social media as well! Check out my most recent posts as well as some earlier, related posts:

• The Extra Day: A Ten-Year Memory
• Of Training Wheels and Christmas Lights
• Charity Starts at Home (And I’m Back in My Childhood One)
• The Muscle of Empathy
• Where Do We Go From Here? Five Years Since January 6.

The article “feeling James T Kirk“ first appeared on Rebuilding Rob.

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