Of Contrarianism and George Costanza

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What could you do differently?

I suppose technically, I could do everything differently.

One of my all-time favorite episodes of Seinfeld is “the opposite”. In the episode, George has an epiphany one day. He realizes that his life is not what he wants it to be. He comes to the conclusion that every decision he has ever made in his life has wrong. After some needling from Jerry, he decides that he should do the opposite. That is, going forward, he will do the exact opposite of whatever he naturally thinks he should do in any situation.

TRUE STORY: Jason Alexander (George) has told stories of fans who have approached him, in the years since Seinfeld has ended. They have said that they followed the George Costanza principle, and completely changed their lives for the better.

While I don’t think that every decision I’ve ever made is wrong, there are certainly things in my life that I could, and would like to, do differently.

Slow down

I try to talk as fast as I think. Even though I’m consciously aware that I do it, I still fall into the habit of doing so. This is especially a problem when it comes to public speaking or even my day job as a teacher.

It’s ironic that I do this, because it drives me crazy when other people do this. They come across as very high-strung; and that is not something that I react well to. As humans, we are like this. We tend to see some of our own worst traits, and other people. While we can’t, or won’t, do anything about these annoying traits within ourselves, we hate it when we see it in others.

Organize!

I’ve always been a spontaneous person. I don’t know if I would go as far as calling it “impulsive” but I usually tend to put things off until the last minute; or even worse, I go into situations with no plan at all. Lately, I’m seeing online the argument that procrastination is a response to anxiety.

Believe it or not, there are certain things in my life that I will put a great amount of planning into. Perhaps it’s because these are things that I’m not anxious about? Procrastinating has become an issue with me and some of my relationships in that people assume that if I’m not planning something out thoroughly, it is a sign that I don’t care. In any case, it is something I’m working on. In fact, month, I made the most comprehensive New Year’s resolution list of my entire life in my blueprint for 2024.

Letting things go

My apologies if that song from Frozen is now ringing through your head…

It seems like every day I hear or see some reminder about letting go of things that I can’t control. i’m sure that it’s because I work in a high school, and those kind of daily affirmation posters are everywhere. That, and social media, of course.

But I always feel the need to remind myself of this: “they’re only two things in life that we can control: what we do, and how react to things other people do to us” That’s it. I’m sure that there is some more succinct phrasing of that idea, but that is the overall message.

It is so easy to play armchair quarterback, to look back on things in hindsight, and say “this is what I would’ve done differently“ but we saw them get those opportunities to do things differently in life. We have to come to terms with our bad decisions in life as learning experiences

Moving on

Even now, I still find myself thinking about Jessica from Time to time. Keep in mind, I broke up with her over a year ago. And while I don’t regret that decision, as I made it from a very well thought out and reasonable place, I still wonder sometimes if things could’ve been different. The truth is, they couldn’t. Things went exactly the way they were supposed to. My relationship with Jessica was a very powerful learning experience for me. It taught me a lot about who I am as a person. What I want in a relationship and, more to the point what I don’t want.

But I also know myself. I tend to think, overthink, over- analyze, second-guess, and reconsider things. I need to learn to trust myself more. I need to make a decision, stick to it, and keep moving forward.

What could you do differently?

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The article “Of contrarianism and George Costanza” originally appeared on Rebuilding Rob

14 responses to “Of Contrarianism and George Costanza”

  1. mUSAfir Avatar

    Good review of Seinfeld and Jason Alexander. Incidentally Jason Alexander was born in the same year I was born. We used to laugh at dumb actions and reactions of George and Kramer but everyone enjoyed them. I wonder if we have any such sitcoms these days as I have stopped watching TV for the past 15 years.

    Those winter cozy post dinner nights in Virginia, I used to watch those sitcoms Seinfeld, Friends, Everybody loves Raymond, The King of Queens with a cup of coffee or chocolate milk gives me nostalgia. Maybe the smartphones killed those types of sitcoms. In a way, they were helping the family bonding indirectly in every living rooms in America.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. rebuilding rob Avatar

      I haven’t watched a lot of new TV in the last 15 years myself. I’m definitely into a lot of my classic stuff and movies.

      But sitcoms definitely have changed. I feel like they’ve taken on more of a cable tone. They’ve eliminated laugh tracks The one second I could really remember altogether, which I’m still not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.

      But yes, I feel like the only sitcoms ive really heard people talk about long after they’ve ended, at least the last 15 years, have been the office and the big bang theory

      Liked by 1 person

      1. mUSAfir Avatar

        The laugh tracks are on the late night shows with more of satire and political comedy.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. rebuilding rob Avatar

        Aren’t most of those shows recorded in front of live audiences now?

        But I wouldn’t be surprised if they use a laugh track in addition to the live audience

        Liked by 1 person

      3. mUSAfir Avatar

        yes, there are live audience but they want synchronized like a chorus. Not one here one there 🧐🙂😊

        Liked by 2 people

      4. GodsChild Avatar

        I didn’t know that ? Really Sorry all Night

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Kevin Avatar

    A lot of great insights here, Rob. Thank you. On a more humorous note, I too go insane when people talk to fast, but find I am like a verbal machine gun if I don’t check myself. And when I make an intentional effort to speak slower, man…It feels way slower than slow. lol
    To others it might sound perfectly normal, but to my ears it feels like I’m a turtle stuck in the mud!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. rebuilding rob Avatar

      I know exactly what you mean, Kevin!

      When I make a conscious effort to slow down, I feel like I’m the stereotypical American, talking to a non-English speaker “ HOW LONG. HAVE YOU. BEEN IN AMERICA?”

      I think we just need to remind ourselves that it’s like public speaking. We’re not speaking nearly as slowly as we feel like we are. Probably because we know what’s in our head and we know what we want to say next.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Kevin Avatar

        LMAO! You nailed it 100%.
        I get self-conscious as hell when I focus on my cadence and feel like an absolute moron, but I keep trying.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. mygenxerlife Avatar

    That is such a great Seinfeld episode!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. rebuilding rob Avatar

      This comment is the COMPLETE OPPOSITE of every comment I’ve seen so far!

      I’m kidding of course. I figured you would enjoy the joke.

      Yeah, this is one of my personal favorites. Whenever I feel bad about myself, I draw inspiration from George.

      Not that that’s setting the bar very high…

      Liked by 2 people

      1. mygenxerlife Avatar

        Hahaha. That gave me a good laugh. They don’t make sitcoms like they used to anymore.

        Liked by 2 people

  4. GodsChild Avatar

    You know it alright now you are so sweet ok

    Liked by 1 person

  5. GodsChild Avatar

    I’m stuck ,you Will have to have a bulldozer to get me out of this house lol

    Like

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