Rebuilding Rob

4 years ago last night, the NBA and college sports began shutting down. Covid cases were confirmed in the United States. The first lockdowns in the United States were beginning today.

For some reason, this is the first time I’ve ever really reflected in the lockdowns. Maybe because I’ve wanted to get back to “normal life“ as quickly as humanly possible and I didn’t want to look back on the lockdown period. But it was also at this time, four years ago, that X2 I split up, for good.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s so much better that we split up just as a lockdowns were starting, rather than trying to split up in the middle of everything.

As it stands, I did very little to no writing back then. I’m not sure why. I think it would’ve been a great escape valve, if I really tapped into it. But I don’t think I was even terribly sad when next two and I split up for good. We had broken up and gotten back together before, so I had been through the sadness, the crying. This time I was just done.

It’s funny because she’s with the same guy that she got with right after splitting up with me. And like us, they’ve already broken up and gotten back together numerous times. I on the other hand has been in a few short term relationships. But I haven’t found anybody that made me think “this is the one”.

In the 1980 presidential debate, Ronald Regan asked one question that is become the lamest test, when judging all incumbents presidents:

Are you better off today than you were four years ago?

I don’t use this quote in its political context. I use the quote to assess where I stand since the outbreak of Covid. I feel a lot stronger today than I did four years ago, because I know that being in a relationship is not the end all be all of my existence. Would I like to be in a relationship? Sure, I like the idea of having a partner in my life. But at the moment, I’m enjoying being single. It’s not that I can’t find somebody, I just can’t find somebody who I want to be with, and wants to be with me simultaneously.

The truth is, I had to get back on my feet. I had to walk before I could run. I think it’s time I start picking up the pace. That’s really what my Blueprint for 2024 was all about. We’ve completed 1/4 of the year and it’s time I get to work.

I’ve been guilty of getting to complacent on more than one occasion in my life. I’ll set a goal for myself. I’ll work toward it. I will achieve it…and then I’ll get comfortable. I need to get myself into a headspace where I never settle. I want to keep pushing myself.

Mentally, psychologically, emotionally, I am much better off than I was four years ago. I feel as if I’m in a better mindset than I’ve been in a long time – maybe ever.

I need to start thinking more about the external stuff. My living and my work situations are good, but I would like for them to be better. I’ve talked about going back to school. It’s time I start working on that.

Thanks for stopping by Rebuilding Rob. Be sure to like, comment and subscribe to my blog below. It’s greatly appreciated! Also, feel free to follow me on social media as well! Check out my most recent posts as well as some earlier, related posts:

• The O.R. Virgin
• A Day in the Life of Rob
• Rob Reviews: The Acolyte. Am I missing the boat here?
• Rob goes green
• The nicest, coldest drink ever

The article “Covid and the Ronald Regan Quadrennial Litmus Test“ first appeared on Rebuilding Rob.