Rebuilding Rob

As WordPress continues to recycle old prompts, I pulled another prompt from The Coffee Monsterz Co to respond to today

What is the hardest goodbye you had to say?

I’m pretty sure I’ve written on this topic before, but the hardest goodbye I’ve ever had to say, by far, was to Kid 1 when X1 and I went through with our separation/divorce and I was moving back from South Carolina to Michigan.

Kid 1 was five when X1 and I separated. It would be roughly 9 months later before our divorce was finalized. It was brutal. I was crying. He was crying. I think even X1 cried a little. I’m sure that she was crying for Kid1 and not for the end of our marriage though.

I was absolutely devastated. I was sad that my marriage failed but that took a backseat to saying goodbye to Kid 1. I knew that I would see him again, but I also knew that our relationship would never be the same again. More than that, it would never be what I thought it SHOULD be.

Keep in mind that I wasn’t getting my own place across town. I wasn’t going to crash on the couch of a work buddy. I was making the 843 mile trip back to Michigan my proverbial between my legs and my pride was reduced to a lump in my throat. The Old Man and Guillaume came done to make the trip back with me. No job, just a minivan full of my things.

I wonder sometimes what that was like for X1 and Kid1. All the pets were still there with them. All the furniture throughout the house was where was had set it up. But I was gone. And while i hate to think that the house was totally rearranged, making it look like I’ve never been there. But at the same time, I understand the necessity to move on.

All I ever wanted in this world was to have as good of a dynamic with my boys that The Old Man and I had. The truth is, I’ll never have that with either one of them. It’s taken a long time but I’ve come to realize that that’s okay. We have what we have, and both of them know that we are a family no matter how much distance separated us.

It’s been 13 years since that fateful day. Like a death in the family sometimes it feels like a lifetime ago. Other times it feels just as raw as it the day it happened. Even writing this today, I could feel the emotions bubbling back to the surface.

Good journey

There’s a line that’s repeated in the 1987 live-action Masters of the Universe. In fact, it’s probably one of the few great bits in the movie. The characters from Eternia talk about how they don’t say “good bye” to one another. Rather, on Eternia the departing salutation is “good journey”. I’ve always like that idea. Departing isn’t the end of anything. It’s just the start of an another new journey.

I know the movie was a flop, but somebody else out there must have actually paid money to see this one in the theater in 1987. Right?

Onward and upward

That phase of my life is, in many ways, over. Kid1 is 18 and in college. in fact, he is physically closer to me in terms of proximity that he has been since he was 5! Of course it won’t be like what it could have, or should have been like when he was a child. He’s older now and are dynamic is evolving. For me, it’s a good thing.

Meanwhile…

X1 and I are coordinating plans to attend Wisconsin’s family weekend late next month. I’m hoping to book a hotel over the weekend. Kid 2 unfortunately won’t be making that trip; but I think it’s important that Kid1 and I get some time to ourselves as well.

As for this weekend, Kid 2 will be with me. I got tickets for the last Tiger home game of the regular season on Sunday.

Thanks for stopping by Rebuilding Rob. Be sure to like, 👍 comment and subscribe to my blog below. It’s greatly appreciated! Also, feel free to follow me on social media as well! Check out my most recent posts as well as some earlier, related (and perhaps, not-so-related) posts:

• Acknowledge Me: The Simple Art of Being Seen
• Rob’s Retro Movie Review: This is Spinal Tap (1984) – The Movie That Scaled to Eleven
• A Death in the Family (And My Disposable Income): My Life in Comics
• The Supporting Cast: Navigating the Eras of Male Friendship
• Life is What Happens: A Look Back at My Non-Existent 2025 Vision

The article “Never Say Goodbye” first appeared on Rebuilding Rob