Decreasing my functional gap in real time

Special thanks to Google Gemini for generating today’s prompt.

what is a small, functional skill you’ve had to learn or master this week that made you realize you’re more capable than you were a year ago?

What I’m going to talk about today isn’t necessarily a new skill that I learned, but something I definitely learned about myself and some steps I probably should’ve taken a while ago in order to rebuild my life—and my credit.

Look, I’ll lay it all out on the table. My credit is horrible. My biggest albatross is my student loan debt—a balance I know, quite literally, I will be paying for the rest of my life. Currently, the only other thing really showing up on my report is a back balance on child support. I’m paying that off consistently, working toward that amount every month. I’m not too worried about that; I was in an even deeper hole when X1 and I first split up, and I made such gains there that the state actually stopped withdrawing support from my paycheck for Kid 1 seven months before he even turned 18.

But as part of Phred and Guillaume’s attempts to help Mother with her own finances, I recently decided to take over the payments on her van and effectively buy the car from her. I went to the same bank she had her loan through and was able to secure a personal loan for the balance.

The Mirror and the Ego

If I’m being honest, what kept me out of that credit union for the last year wasn’t a lack of information—it was my own ego. My financial burdens have been hanging over my neck for a long time. It was easier to keep my head in the sand. I didn’t want to take that hard look in the mirror or risk the shame of another “denied” notification. It’s funny how we can know something is a “secured loan” logically, but still let fear keep us from walking through the door. Had I known it would have been this easy, I would’ve done this a year ago.

Vindication and the “Baby of the Family”

As the youngest in the family, there’s a persistent “baby of the family” dynamic that’s hard to shake. There’s often this unspoken perception that everyone has to look out for me. But being able to take this off my mother’s hands and tell my siblings, “I got this,” felt like a moment of true vindication. For once, I wasn’t the one being looked after; I was the one contributing to the “team win.” It feels empowering to know that by strengthening my own foundation, I’m building more resources to help my kids down the road.

Serendipity at 52

I was able to get an account set up with my local credit union, which again, I should’ve done a while ago. They were even able to get me a credit card—something I haven’t had for at least a decade. After three months of Phred and I chasing a convoluted paper trail through original lenders and our local Secretary of State office, having it all click into place on my 52nd birthday felt incredibly serendipitous. It wasn’t just “new year, new me” fluff; it was the result of grit, patience, and finally being willing to look at the scoreboard.

Look, I’m not a yuppie. I’m not trying to buy a fancy car or a mansion. I just want financial autonomy. I want to know I have resources available for everyday life. It’d be nice to apply for a card without a computer laughing at me.

I work full-time. I have a place to live. I never go without. But my interaction at the bank on Friday made me feel like I’m actually “getting ahead” for the first time in a long time. I have more resources at my disposal than I realized. I just had to be brave enough to go claim them.

Rebuilding a life takes grit, consistency, and a lot of ‘Option C’ thinking. Whether I’m 900 days into a streak or reflecting on the decade of posts that led me here, the mission remains the same. New to the blog? Start your journey here to see the blueprint behind the rebuild.

Today’s post is inspired by the WordPress Daily Prompt. While I’ve taken the topic in my own direction for the Road to 1,000 Days, you can find more responses to today’s prompt HERE .

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AI art created by Google Gemini.

The article “Decreasing my functional gap in real time” first appeared on Rebuilding Rob