Rebuilding Rob

Kid 2 and I were on our way out to see Mother at her assisted living place. As I was getting on the road, I started thinking about where I’m at in my love life, and even if I want to have another exclusive long-term relationship. And for the first time in my life, I’m really trying to come to terms with the fact that, right now, I don’t want one.

As I was driving and coming to terms with some of these realizations, I get a text message from Guillaume today. For those of you who might be due to this blog, Guillaume is my older brother, who I never really talk very much about because we don’t have a lot of contact.

Guillaume had sent a group text message to Phred and I. It’s a thread that we have going, usually for things that pertain to Mother. But today he apologized to us for not being around much lately. He hasn’t been stopping by to help out with Mother or anything because he and his wife “are having family problems at home “

I must admit that I have had a feeling for a while that things were not going very well in Guillaume‘s marriage. I had my own personal issues with his wife for years. It goes back to my relationship with X2 . It even continued on when I was dating OR Nurse. The real irony is that I am not with either one of them today and I still carry that animosity towards his wife.

But the truth is, I don’t want see my brother go through this again. He’s already been divorced once. Also, it was he and The Old Man who came down to help me pack my things  as I was leaving South Carolina.

And even though X2 and I weren’t married, in a lot of ways we may as well have been. The break up was not unlike the end of a marriage, at least from an emotional standpoint.

There’s loads of statistics that bring us to the conclusion that marriage is on the decline. Divorce rates are climbing there’s even some studies coming out now they’re saying that young people seem to be before foregoing relationships altogether.

In its own way, I think my brother‘s potential marriage trouble is leaving me even more discouraged about relationships than ever. Yes it’s true that Guillaume has already been through one divorce. Phred has also been through one divorce. I have been through one divorce myself. Yes, it’s true that we can say that all three of us have been through a divorce. But the idea of that key was, I’ll be at seemingly, happily married, gave me hope. It made me think that maybe, if I were to meet the right person, things could work out. If anything, this news only makes me feel a greater sense of futility with permanent long-term relationships.

I didn’t want to go through my whole “love disappears“ phase at nearly 51 years old, but here I am. 

What’s wrong with us? Seriously. I mean, specifically, my brother, my sister and I. Because I know that the majority of marriages end up in divorce now; but for the three of us, it was unanimous. Across the board. A clean sweep. None of our marriages made it. I understand that we’re all our own individual people who are bringing our own relationship histories into a marriage. And likewise, all of our partners are individuals who are bringing their own relationship histories into a marriage. But it’s just odd all three of us ended up going through divorces. At some point, you have to ask yourself “what is the common denominator?”

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not about to enter into some deep existential crisis where I begin questioning my entire relationship, history and second-guessing every decision ever made. But it does have me wondering.

Thanks for stopping by Rebuilding Rob. Be sure to like, 👍 comment and subscribe to my blog below. It’s greatly appreciated! Also, feel free to follow me on social media as well! Check out my most recent posts as well as some earlier, related posts:

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The article “Wither, long-term relationships?” first appeared on Rebuilding Rob.