This is a very awkward question to ask a man. I don’t know what my home decoration style is. Eclectic nerd? I’m certainly not ultra-modern. I’m not early American. I guess someone would say contemporary. I grew up in a very plain home. My parents kept the walls white or off-white. Of course, sometimes the ceilings were stained with yellow marks from my dad smoking in the house when I was a kid.
At the moment, my sister and I are sharing my childhood home. We’re gradually taking steps to police and carve out our own identity, rather than living inside a monument to our parents. My dad passed away 11 years ago, and with my mom’s health declining later on, a lot of things just stayed frozen in time—unmoved and unused for years.
Take the front lawn, for instance. Back when my brother was in his ultra-conservative phase in his late teens, he put up a flagpole. No one had flown a flag on that pole in years. So, this past spring, I finally took the pole out of the ground, replaced the topsoil and grass, and got rid of it.
It’s not that I want to wipe away everything that belonged to my parents. The truth is, I’m proud of this house. My dad bought it in the late 1970s on a cop’s salary, back when a single-income family could actually afford a home. On my teacher’s salary today? I couldn’t afford it. I know that. He wasn’t some real estate visionary; when they moved out here, it really wasn’t much of a suburb yet. My grandparents actually laughed at them when they heard where they were heading because there was “nothing there.” But the place exploded in the 80s, 90s, and 2000s. I want to do right by this house. I just want to make it feel like my home, too.
The truth is, I really don’t know what my style is yet. But I know I don’t want it to look like my college apartment—even if that place had its own character. I never had the cliché cinder-block-and-plywood shelves, though I did inherit a coffee table from my grandmother. It was a mismatch of decent thrifted finds, a couch, a loveseat, and movie posters on the wall. Unlike most people, I actually framed mine. I’ve still got a true, double-sided theater poster that I’d love to put in a proper light box frame one day—the kind where one side is printed backward so the backlight shines right through without blowing out the white background.
At the same time, I’m shedding that old gear. I’m done with big, hulking entertainment centers, even if I’m still trying to figure out how to mount a flat-screen without having cords dangling everywhere.
As a guy in his 50s, I see those social media memes of a single guy’s apartment with literally an air mattress, a TV, and nothing else, captioned with “men really live like this and see nothing wrong.” But for me, it’s the opposite. I’m kind of sick of having too many material possessions weighing down the room. Part of that definitely stems from having to pack up and clear out my personal belongings twice—once during my divorce, and again after I split up with X2. When you go through that, clutter loses its appeal real fast.
Honestly, the only room I’ve ever truly cared about the appearance of is the bathroom. Red, black, and white is my absolute favorite color scheme—as anyone who looks at this blog can probably guess.
Beyond that, my bedroom needs to be my sanctuary within my sanctuary. I want it to be the one place where I am completely at peace. I just haven’t figured out what that looks like yet.
My current home decor style is simply “I have no style.” I prefer function over form. Form is just gravy right now as far as I’m concerned.
Related Listening: While we’re on the subject of holding your ground and figuring out what comes next, the latest episode of Rebuilding Rob: The Podcast went live early this morning. Episode “Holding the Line” dives into leadership, the heavy burden of being the one in charge, and what it’s really like being the last man standing. Listen now here or on your favorite podcast app.
Rebuilding a life takes grit, consistency, and a lot of ‘Option C’ thinking. Having crossed the 1,000-day milestone, I’m now charting the territory beyond. The mission remains the same: No glitz. Just the work. New to the blog? Start your journey here to see the blueprint and the ‘Tricorder’ perspective behind the rebuild.
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The article “Eclectic Nerd and Other Design Theories” first appeared on Rebuilding Rob
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